Saturday, August 28, 2010

Learning As I Go

The earlier post was an eye-opening epiphany for me. I think I needed to get down on paper where I am at THIS place in my life. I needed a place to put it all until I was able to go back and reflect. The past few days have been a few days of reflection for me.

You that expression about how, to eat an elephant, you have to tackle it one bite at a time. That's got to be my approach to life. The house: Well, it has to be handled one piece at a time. That means if it's one floor, one room, one closet or the tiniest corner, it's all about taking it one thing at a time. I have a tendency to get overwhelmed because I feel like I have to do everything and do it all at the same time. So yesterday, while The Bug was home sick from school, I tackled part of the kitchen. I did some deep cleaning but did not allow myself to feel like I failed when I didn't cover it from top to bottom. I'll finish up in there in a couple of days. Instead in the afternoon I did my dusting and vacuuming and fluffing in the living room.

I am working on getting a handle on my school work. Just like with the elephant, I decided to make a master list of all my classes and when my assignments are due and I am working my way through them. In whatever spare time I have, I need to read 10 middle school books. I've managed to take care of six of them this week. I want to get this part of my assignment over and done so that I can focus on other things....like reading something because I want to ... not because I have to for a grade. Bowling is turning out to be fun and believe it or not, this non-bowler is one of the better ones in my class. That means the rest of my class is really BAD or practicing on the Wii was a good idea. I vote for the Wii. It has allowed me to focus on the 4-step approach, which was driving me crazy the first time we bowled in class.

In all of this I have realized that I need to find some time for me. I spend most of my time worrying about working or going to school or being a good mom and wife. I have read before about people who lose themselves in the process of trying to please everyone else. Maybe that's what has happened to me. I spend too much time trying to please everyone else. So I need to make time to take care of myself because if I spread myself too thin there won't be any of me left for the people who are important in my life. I need to make time to get healthy, too. One step at a time. And a setback is not a failure. That's a hard idea to process because I think once I slip up and eat something I shouldn't, I feel like I have failed and fall back into my bad habits rather than realizing it was a bump in the road and that tomorrow is another day.

These past six months have held a lot of change for us. I am hopeful in the next six months things will have changed for me. One day at a time. One idea at a time....learning as I go. I'm going to have remind myself down this path that you should never postpone the joy of life.

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